Jun/080
Quitting your day job
I had some brilliant news today. Off and on I've been in touch with Andy, a friend of mine from my London days for the past few years. He's been keeping up to date with his London escape plan, which has neccarily had to remain secret so as spook his employers. But today he's reached escape velocity has been reached and is taking up that most modern of challenges - Quitting his day job, turning off the TV and going to do something less boring instead.
He'll be working for Coral Cay Conservation as a professional scuba diver in Asia. Go on, mate - 'ave it! Read more about Andy's plans here. Go on. I dare you!
Jun/080
Jay Z @ glasto
The dude was brilliant. If you're not at Glastonbury, and you're not listening to it on the BBC then..... you should be! Hip hop headlining on the main stage of Glasto! Historic. X to the zee man, you knows it.
But yeh, I guess listening it to the festival from my garden, over the internet with only Tia the cat for company would be a different experience than being in the field with 170,000 people smelling like cow shit. I wish I'd been there.
Jun/080
Tin bath gardening
After a week or so away from the computer I was feeling pretty relaxed. After a couple of days working for London clients this week I was suddenly back to being a bit stressed again. Luckily, there's been a bit of a lull in the work today so I've been able to chill out.
The weather's been great since I got back from the coast, and I've been sorting out the garden. I inherited an old tin bath when I was in Germany which I've decided to grow herbs in . There it is in the back of the picture. My smartarse friend was worrying me the other night by telling me that if I didn't bang holes in the bottom of the bath to drain the excess water, then it wouldn't work. But I don't want to bang holes in it. It destroys it's purpose as a bath.Apparently my mother was bathed in it when she was a baby & you never know - I might bathe my own baby in it one day.

So that's what the yellow hosepipe sticking out of the soil is for. The pipe goes down to the bottom of the bath and if I need to I'll be able tot lift the bath up a bit and syphon any excess water out if it starts to build up. The seeds for 8 different of my favourite herbs and a mish-mash of mountain flowers are propagating on seed trays in front of the bath, so my gardening's done and it's time to light the BBQ and let the charcoal heat up for an hour or two before grilling the pork chops and chicken I'm marinading in the fridge.
I love my life today. Just pottering about, cooking, gardening, sitting in the sun listening to Wimbledon on radio 5 - playing a bit of xbox when the sun gets too hot. Perhaps I'll watch the footy down the pub tonight to see who's going to meet ze Germans in the coup de Europe final. Perhaps not. Either way. The sun's over the yard arm and I'm going to crack open that cold bottle of rose while I watch the BBQ heat up.
Jun/082
Wombledin
I used to love Wimbledon. I knew the players - boris becker, steffi graf - martina bloomin' navratilova. I can't get the BBC iPlayer outside of the UK without a dodgy UK proxy which never works brilliantly here TBH. But I'd love to follow Wimbledon this year - how should I do it? Radio 5 live perhaps? I don't have TV, especially not UK TV. Anyone got great ideas? Has anyone got a sling media box set up that they could let me use for the fortnight? I'd be very grateful :)
Jun/081
A brilliant dive holiday in Antibes
It was a really great holiday. The money issues were sorted out fairly quickly by giving some random yank a lift down to the coast & him chipping in for fuel. Also, just simply taking the decision not to spend any money. It's amazing how little you need to spend sometimes, even in the South of France. I've got a fridge in the van, the wherewithal to cook all my meals, to camp out - to do everything I need to do. Money - it's overrated at times. No need to be kept prisoner by the lack of it.
To be honest what I really needed from the trip was some sun. It had been pissing down in Chamonix for a month and we all had cabin fever. The weather down on the coast was amazing. Hot English summer type weather; 27+ degrees & sunny, with a sea breeze in the evenings to cool off. Perfect.
So anyway, I turned up in Antibes on Tuesday night and met up with Alex in the Blue Lady. One of the snottiest, yachtiest bars in a town famous for snotty yachtiness. He sorted me out with my hotel and let me know where to meet him the next day for the diving. All that side of things was already paid for you see :) So 8:30am I was at the Port Gallice getting my kit together and hanging out in the van. Since I've carpeted it and removed a row of seats has actually become a very handy place to hang out. It's 2 years since I last dived and I was pretty nervy. I'm probably getting a bit old, but diving can be pretty dangerous and there's not much room for screwing things up.
But there were no problems. 2 great dives during the day off an lighthouse just off the coast from Antibes. Then it was time to start the learnin'. I was there to do some further diving qualification with Alex - to become qualified to dive on Nitrox. There are many good reasons to dive on Nitrox (normal air with extra oxygen added to it) - safety and longer bottom times are the usual reasons, but for me it is also that diving on Nitrox is a far nicer experience than diving on air. Less headaches, less tiredness at the end of the day, and frankly having load more oxygen in your system is always going to feel great.
It's the best drug in the world, Oxygen. Impossible to overdose, and a cure-all for pretty much everything that ails you. Just a shame it's so damn expensive to buy medicinal oxygen. The only problem with diving on Nitrox is that breathing too much oxygen at depth can cause a contidition called Oxygen Toxicity. This makes a diver convulse and pass out. Not neccessarily dangerous in itself, but underwater you're bound to spit out your regulator and drown immediately. So that's a risk you have to manage with proper training and dive tables etc.
So that evening, an imrovised dinner at the hotel followed by a couple of drinks on the promenade in Juan Les Pins as the sun went down. I went to bed a very happy man. The next day's diving was even better. 2 great dives off the Cap d'Antibes, this time breathing 33% Nitrox mix. It makes such a difference to the quality of the dives.
Alex was getting frustrated with me for not knowing anything about the theory of partial pressures etc. It's 13 years since I did my original open water course and learned how to plan dives properly with tables that I simply didn't remember how to do it. I dive on a computer, and they take care of all that stuff for you. So lunchtime was a 2 hour theory lesson over lunch before the second dive of the day, and then back to Alex's place to take the exam. Amazingly I passed it the first time around with a decent score and bosh - I'm now a qualified Nitrox diver meaning I can buy enriched air fills from any dive operation offering the service all over the world.

Diving with Alex was a pleasure. Alex and I are friends (me having been his first ever client when he set up his business), but as a diver he's a consumate professional dive instructor and he took me through my course and dived with me for 2 days in such a calm, collected way it made the whole course an absolute pleasure. There's a little film in the pipeline - an advert for Diamond Diving - coming in a week or so.
So that was that. Friday night I left Antibes around 6pm, and drove an hour or so inland past Grasse (the town from the book 'Perfume'), had dinner in a small village brasserie and then carried on for a while until I found a deserted parking spot near Castellane in Haute Provence. With all the kit - tent, air matress, water, stove for coffee in the morning, camping is an easy pleasure and set me up for the rest of the drive back to Chamonix the next day.
So a great trip. Well planned, well executed and successful in all regards. And now, back in Chamonix, the weather has finally turned & it's hot and sunny. Summer weather at last.
Jun/080
A bit of adventure
I'm off diving today. Down to Antibes on the Cote D'Azur to dive with a friend of mine, Alex, who runs a dive operation down there, Diamod Diving.

Aside from the adventure of the actual diving I have another, unwelcome adventure at the same time. Although I've already paid for the diving & accomodation etc, I haven't got the money for the fuel to get down there and back. That's all part of being a freelancer. Getting paid at the whim of some accounts department whenever they feel like it. So even thought there's a couple of £K on it's way into my UK account, I'm still going to have to drive the long way around through Grenoble down to the coast because I haven't got enough money for the tolls & tunnel charges.
Still, it's all part of the adventure & I'm not going to let a little thing like money get in the way of this holiday, I've been looking forward to it for weeks. I just hope that the EUR 125 I have in my wallet, the full tank of diesel and the debit card which might stop working at any moment will take me all the way :)
Jun/081
Respecting Eurotrash
The other night I crossed the border between Switzerland and Germany. It was 1am, I was driving my French registered, left hand drive van with sunnies on the top of my head.
The German border guard lady stopped me and asked to look at my passport. So I hand over my British passport and watched her eyebrows go up. She took it off to the computer to look me up. When she came back she asked me in terrible English “Vot do you vont in Germany?” So I replied in pretty decent German, telling her that I was driving to Paderborn to deal with some family business.
Her eyebrows went up again, but this time there was definitely an amused smirk on her face as she waved me through. Respecting how eurotrash I seemed is what I like to think she was thinking.
Jun/080
Just stepping out
Tia's owner's friend came over this morning to pick up a set of keys to my place so she can take care of Tia for the 4 or 5 days I'm away. I'm driving up to Paderborn in Germany this afternoon. Organising someone to feed the cat was the last thing on a long list of stuff to get done before the trip.
Finding some storage space in the valley for the van load of stuff I'm going to be bringing back with me, and then removing the seats from my Volkswagen transporter were high on that list. The seats were a bit rusted to their mountings & needed the help of a car jack & the hydraulic spanner down at the local garage to get sorted, but I now have a van rather than a minibus.
I'm a bit sad about this trip. I'm going to meet some of my family and help to clear an old family house that was build by my Grandfather, Big Joesph, who died a decade ago. Long story, but the short of it is that it's the last time I'll ever see the house that I've known all my life. We're selling it, and I don't imagine that I'll even ever return to Paderborn.
Here's me as a baby sitting on Big Joesph's knee
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Jun/081
A funny secret
I quite look forward to Sundays - it's the day I get the PostSecret post. If you've never come across this strangley addictive community art project then have a look at the back-story.
Anyhoo... the secrets are often a bit bleak & depressing, but this one really made me laugh out loud today.
Jun/081
Murdering Little Bastard
Today's blog entry is a film. Taking the concept of blogging a bit further, I guess video blogging isn't new, but it's the first time I feel like a post on this blog really crosses the boundry between writing and film-making.
Below is the script, which could well be read as a blog post, but better still is watching the movie. Now that I'm using Vimeo to publish my films on the web (instead of youtube), it means the quality is not only much higher, but you can also watch the film in full screen mode. Just click the button illustrated in this picture to try it.
Murdering Little Bastard from Chris D on Vimeo.

So here's the script:
I've been looking after Tia the cat for the last couple of months now. She's only little. But she's cute isn't she? She doesn't say much, Tia. She's a quiet cat. So I was surprised to hear her calling to me. Turns out out she was really proud of herself. She's been trying for a long time, but today she'd finally managed to murder some poor creature. She proudly showed me this sad little dead bird. Offering me first dibs should want to bite it's head off I suppose. Then she spent a happy 10 minutes re-killing it and showing me how clever she was. How very sweet. Murdering little bastard. I'll miss her when she goes. She's off to a new home soon. She might be a murdering bastard. But she's my murdering bastard. At least for now.
& here's the film
Murdering Little Bastard from chris dorward on Vimeo.

