A slight derailment.
Working in London is very stressful, and sometimes its difficult to keep focused on the goal. I’ve been doing quite well up till now, but suddenly at the end of last week the cumulative pressure built up a little too much and I suddenly found myself on a mini-bender. Not in the same league as those benders in your early 20’s, but a recognisable bender none the less.
Suddenly I’m drinking coffee and smoking fags to get going in the morning, drinking booze to calm myself down in the evening, passing out rather than falling asleep. I’m not thinking about what I’m eating and have been putting on a lot of weight. I can also feel my fitness and energy slipping away - wheezing as I walk up the hills in Brighton, and possibly most destructive of all - spending far too much of the money I’m earning for the winter in the Alps.
It was bound to happen at some point. It’s a trap I’ve fallen into before. One I really escaped only by leaving London in the first place. But if I can nip it in the bud right now and refocus myself on the goal. That goal is to earn a fair amount of money for a fair amount of work and return to France strong, healthy and having quit smoking ready for the winter season to begin.
I think moving up to Surrey Quay at the end of the month will help. I’ll have more time to chill and there’s a gym with a pool and sauna nearby where I can start to get into shape in the evenings.
7 more weeks till I go home. To some that might not sound much, but at the moment it seems like a lifetime to me.
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