Quit your day job. Go on. I dare you.

I can feel myself back at full speed. I’ve been pretty relaxed for several months, but I can feel the adrenaline flowing now, the stress building in my shoulders and the focus forming. I’ve got a job on, it’s tricky, pressurised and screwing it up carries big consequenses for both my own business and the people who are paying me. It’s not sustainable of course, and there’s all kind of reasons why this is bad for me, but I have missed it, and it feels good to be so fired up. Plus… you don’t get paid for sitting about dreaming up cool scams do ya?

So I’m back in London for a couple of weeks. This time is not just a flying visit and a couple of meetings, it’s 2 full weeks of being in the office at 9 am, and working through to 6 or 7. That meant taking on the Northern Line this morning, and if you haven’t read my thoughts on London commuting, click here to see what it’s like.

Being back properly is a little bit like that first time I went back to school after I’d finished my A levels and left. During my first little foray out into the real world I looked back at my last year of school as the height of sophistication, but the first time I went back it suddenly felt small, isolated and a little laughable. London feels a little like that to me today.

One thing I have missed about London is the food. The tartiflettes, rabbit casseroles, cheese fondues etc are great, but sometimes I crave poached salmon, sautéed potatoes with caramelised onions and fine green beans with a chilled glass of Chablis.

Lunch @ The Angelic - £10.25

I’ve been missing cinema, so at the first opportunity I went to see a movie when I got to London this afternoon. It could only be one film, really: The Da Vinci Code.

It was shit. I’m not going to beat around the shrubbery. Really very poor.

OK yes, the pretty dark haired girl who plays the lead is every man’s fantasy of a pretty young wife and the dialogue wasn’t terrible, but the cinematic storytelling left a lot to be desired and the action was as stilted and unconvincing as the original book was badly written.

So why all the hype about the Da Vinci Code if it’s so bad? It’s all about the concept. Christ had a bloodline and we’ve been lied to by rich, powerful men for 2000 years. Yeh wotever. Smacks more to me of some dirty hack thinking to himself…..

“I need to write a book to make some cash. What can I write about? I know! What’s the greatest story ever told? Jesus Christ! How can I spin something off the back off that? I guess I could find a couple of academic numpties, nick their ideas and shoe-horn them into a generic thriller format, but no one would be so stupid as to fall for something so transparently pony?”

But we are that stupid. We’ve bought that tripe hook, line and sinker. Yes it’s an intriguing story, but one which is told best in a pub after 3 pints. It’s about on a par with the Marlboro packet design containing a reference to the Klu Klux Klan, and the American dollar being covered in Masonic imagery. Five minutes and I’ve got it, I’m bored and I’ve moved on. Even if you add a psycho, self-flagellating albino monk. I’m still not buying it.

So to sum up, Dan Brown is a proper James Blunt and my only regret is that even by writing this blog entry I add fuel to the dirty shameful fire of publicity around this travesty of storytelling.

Tartiflette is a French dish from the Savoy region. It originated in the valley of Aravis, home of reblochon cheese. I made it for the first time this afternoon at my folks place. It’s not the most healthy dish in the world, but it’s very delicious.

1-3/4 pounds Yukon Gold potatoes (5 or 6 medium-sized ones, all the same size) or waxy boiling potatoes
5 or 6 ounces slab bacon, or salt pork, cut into lardons about 1″ x 1/4″ by 1/4″
2 tablespoons butter
1 medium onion (about 6 ounces, peeled), finely chopped
1/4 cup dry white wine or dry vermouth
6 tablespoons heavy cream (1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons)
Salt and pepper to taste, probably at least 1/2 teaspoon salt, possibly more
1/2 of a 1-pound reblochon cheese

Click here to get the full method for making it